It was an 8 month dating, we became friends, we enjoy each other, I learned to like this person and prayed for him, yeah I think I have somehow loved him. But the dating was ended when I learned that he was not ready for commitment. So I realized, what’s the use of dating or knowing each other more, if other the party was not ready for commitment. When I say commitment here It doesn’t mean that you get married soon, what I mean is your dating has a purpose. And not just dating for the sake of having someone beside you.
Somehow I got hurt, I felt used, I questioned God, I felt like he made me a promise and broken it, I felt like He gave me a toy and He takes it back when I start enjoying it. From the very first day of our dating, I told God this “Stop this dating if this guy is not your will for me” maybe God has been speaking to me but I just ignored it. I prolonged the dating game and what happened we both hurt each other.
I let go of him, knowing that’s the best for both of us. I let go of the pains and I let Him work in me. I know, only when I am completely free that I am to respond appropriately.
I submitted everything to Him. Instead of dictating the specifics, I let him choose for me. I decided to place my faith in who He is, and what His word promises.
I praise God, because I thought it will take me a month to totally let go but it took me 3 days only, God made it easy for me maybe because He knew that what I really wanted was not to be committed to someone but to do what is in my heart.
God has been dealing me in different areas in preparation for my mate. Even my old baggage from childhood was brought to my attention. One thing for sure God is preparing me for that day when I will be delivered to the person that He has prepared for me. He’s doing a work of perfection in me. He wants to be glorified through our lives as couple. I know what happened was not the end but just a delay. I don’t know who that guy is, maybe I have met him already, maybe I will still meet him, maybe he’s just around the corner and maybe he still in the other side of the worldJ well, God will orchestrate everything.
For now, I will concentrate on the things that God wants me to do. I am free now and I am willing to go where God wants me to go even being out of my comfort zone, willing do to do the things that God wants me to do. And now He’s opening doors for me.
© 2008 by jhunnelle