Yesterday Albert and I celebrated our 3 years of marriage, time flies so quickly. I still can’t quite believe it’s been 3 years. Honestly those three years were not always blissful. Oh yes, we had countless fight and misunderstanding. We thank God indeed for His grace, He never gave up on us. It’s His grace that accompany us to the challenges of marriagehood. I’ve learned so much from this marriage and still discovering a lot of things. Indeed through this marriage He is making us more and more like Him.
Two years ago, I wrote this on my journal, I just want to share it here.
When I was single there were a lot of things I wrongly believed about marriage which I only realize now. We have heard some couples saying I couldn’t ask for more. This guy completes me, as if they are saying that marriage is the place where your longings, unhappiness, your dreams needs are being met. Well i think most of the singles out there believe that way too. Maybe that’s the reason why a lot of singles are unhappy of their present status because they thought that marriage can make them happy and complete. One thing that I’ve learned marriage is not a place where we can get all our needs met , either a place where we can get complete happiness.
God did not design marriage that way. Marriage is a place where He can make us more and more like Him. There were times that i was disappointed, frustrated and betrayed. Why, because I’m trying to let my spouse meet my needs, marriage for me is something like “I, me and myself” it is about myself, my needs being met, my expectations being satisfied, my laws being obeyed, this is how i view marriage till the Holy Spirit opened my eyes one day and he made me realize that marriage is being selfless, it is about meeting other’s need instead of my needs, it is about being broken to self and broken in the sight of God, it is the place where God exposed my selfishness, my pride and taught me humility, selflessness, unity, service, submission and teamwork, it’s a bit hard though. From time to time there is still that battle waging inside of me. It is His grace that accompany me to the challenges of marriagehood if not for that I might not make it
Marriage is a place where He is conforming the couples to His likeness. It is not a place where our needs met because only Him can do that. Marriage can be much fulfilling if we view it the way God views it, that is, a place where we can be like Him, a place where we can show Christ’s love by doing what the scriptures say about how we can love and honor our spouse.